Boys Are The Enemy

You're twelve years old, and about to demote your best friend Kyla to second-best friend status. Stephanie, your current second-best friend, just alerted you to Kyla's recess-time activities. Steph swears she saw Kyla at lunchtime behind the soccer field goalpost.

Kyla was committing the worst crime imaginable. It was worse than ratting to Mr. B that you'd cheated on the last test. It was worse than kidnapping your pet hamster and feeding it to Susie's brother's pet snake. It was worse than telling everyone about your irrational fear of the McDonald's clown, and the time you peed in your pants when you went on a field trip and stopped by a McDonald's.

Kyla was caught fraternizing with the enemy.

Because you're a socially precocious twelve-year old, you decide to approach Kyla in private.

"Steph saw you behind the soccer goalpost on Tuesday," you begin.
"Well, I was - I was -"
"Don't lie to me, Kyla. Steph saw everything."
"It's true," Kyla confesses. "I like boys."
"You can't like boys AND be my best friend," you declare stoically.
"Why not?" she asks. "I only like one guy. I don't like all of them. Paul's really nice."
"Paul!? So it's Paul?" you exclaim in exasperation.
"What's wrong with Paul?"
"Well, for one, Paul... Paul's a boy. And boys are the enemy!"
"Can't I still be your best friend?" Kyla pleas.
"Absolutely not. You've got boy cooties now. I'm not sure we should hang out at all. Anyway, Steph is my new best friend."

Tears well up in Kyla's eyes. You would cry too, but you have to be the strong one. It's tough to lose your friend from kindergarten. You used to share the same favorite Crayon colors, the same jokes about the school principal, and even the same lego sets.

But Kyla had betrayed you in the worst way possible. You leave her there by the swing set and scan the playground for your new Best Friend.